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Balk this dealing !!!

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You may ask me not to show my feelings,
but can not stop me from feeling at all.
I try to keep my wounds as fresh as new,
I do not wish them to get on healing at all.
I always treat my pains as my best friends,
in return they spare me from kneeling at all.
Who cares for if there is any higher existence,
I never sense the desire of appealing at all.
I feel being so jaded of tolerating my self,
and merely wish to balk this dealing at all.
_________

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