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The Mindset
(4 votes, average: 4.50 out of 5, rated)
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We were the very best of friends, as any friends can be
Always by my side, he really cared for me…
I was brought up with a mindset, deeply ingrained in my mind
Marriages are made in heaven but - “The Boy, Parents will find!”
I did not take it seriously when he proposed marriage, too
“We belong to different states – How can I marry you?”
With this determined mindset, our relationship did end….
I lost the man who loved me, I lost my best friend!
Three long years went by…Talks were on of my match…
The girl is well qualified, they said, She can get a very good catch!
I watched with disdainful agony as they weighed the pros and cons
Some trying to find me a life partner- Some just trying to sell their sons
Is this what an arranged match…Is really meant to be?
Arranged as per status, Dictated like a decree!
Is similar back ground and culture? All that really mattered?
What about love and attraction? My heart was totally shattered…
Suddenly one August morning, on a wet and rainy day…
I received a sudden phone call, heard a familiar voice say
“Do you recognize me?” My heart did skip a beat
As we laughed over old days and planned to quickly meet
He proposed to me again, said time could never kill
The feelings of true love – he nurtured for me still
Confused, I asked my mother, what I was supposed to do
She smiled and said “Break tradition – But don’t tell your dad I knew”!
She stood by me all through it – Right till the very end
I got back my true love – I got back my best friend!!
Soon we got married… across the seven seas we flew
I overcame my mindset – My dreams all came true!!
Note: This poem speaks of my own experience and is not in any way
meant to undermine or disregard culture, tradition, values or arranged
marriages .
45 Comments
Very Nice.
I am glad you made a right choice, coz, as time tested, feelings never fade with the right partner.
Finally Love prevailed 
no better feelings
a tuff topic written very well in a lucid way & well rhymed.
liked the poem very much
seema Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 2:26 pm
@vijay, Thanks Viju…yes that sure is one phone call I can never forget….
vijay Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 3:50 pm
@seema,
yes u shud never
as also never 4get 2 thank mom dearest
Very loving & nice poem of one’s own life happenings.
Arranged marriages are also successful with their own advantages & disadvantages, so are love marriages too. At present a combination of the two systems where the families also take initiative in the interest of the couple wanting to get married is I think the best solution and that is the mindset to be cultivated. The couple should themselves realize what is in the ultimate good for them. The elders should be catalysts & facilitators in their decisions.
Your parents role in the whole affair appears to be also exemplary, in the right decision from both of you.
Waaw!
Superb! Excellent!
seema Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 4:04 pm
@Vikash, Aah!! A rare comment from the reticent one.. what a delight!Thank you.
Vikash Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 4:06 pm
@seema, I’m not as reticent as you may feel. Besides, if something really touches my heart, I’m not afraid to admit.
Hey! Thanks for sharing your story in the form we love the most !! Incredible
seema Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 9:20 pm
@renu rakheja, Thanks Renu… would love to hear every one’s stories.. hope fully some day…
Hey Seema, I am glad you made it, you got your Love in life and believe me, say what you want, but if it was yours it was destined for you!
Lucky you
P.S. Thats (lucky you) a great movie BTW .
seema Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 10:59 pm
@Manish, Manish… you and your movies..LOL!!
As usual dad took the initiative and did all the work and you take the credit for it…now let’s overcome our mindset about my studies also =P
Cool poem.
seema Reply:
February 21st, 2009 at 12:26 am
@shinjini, Sure… LOL!! As soon as your exams are over!!
Those who refuse to follow the rut laid by others are the ones closer to the truth…closer to self. And they are the true seekers – the ones always stretching the world to accommodate the growing number of theologies and fellow brethren.Opening new avenues…showing new paths. Like Columbus trying to reach east by sailing west. a weird idea seemed to the elders at that time.Yet the young Columbus was proved to be closer to truth and not the elders.And so did Gaileleo , when he said – it still moves ( earth ) and 400 years later we know , gaileleo was right and not the wise men ordained in white dresses, and so did Seema when she said – when two hearts love and melt then why not the two states. After all east has met west and twain shall not say the same.
seema Reply:
February 21st, 2009 at 2:46 am
@Daring, LOL! You make it sound like a collosal achievement Abhay…it really was a matter of overcoming my mind set… and that what life made me do…Thankfully.
For what has not been- shall be one day, finally – for the seekers and never shall be – for the sheep lost in herd, always. Few of us dream and fewer still dare to live by their dreams.And mother earth helps the darings to live by their dreams
seema Reply:
February 21st, 2009 at 2:48 am
@Daring, So True..I wish every one lives by their dreams and is able to achieve them….
thnks..for this lovely gift…
seema Reply:
February 22nd, 2009 at 11:12 am
@Nishant khare, Thank you for referring to it as a gift…feels so good that a cherished memory of one’s mind touches people and strikes a chord…Thanks.
i know it must be more more than a poem for u… so i won’t weigh it as a poem… but truly it touched me… and as a poem too..it’s brilliant…
This one is truly inspirational for me… can relate to it and u’ll know y 
luv u, its rocking…
seema Reply:
March 4th, 2009 at 3:14 pm
Yes Dikshu, Hope you are really going to follow my footsteps as well…looking forward to it…
And wow! wouldn’t that be a real tribute to this poem of mine…
no words to praise the illustration done by you . while reading, an amazing wave passed through the entire body… you have expressed the entire narration with such simple and beautiful words….
I at times write, will share the same with you and love to know your comments on the same when where god knows or दिक्शा.
Seema Reply:
March 5th, 2009 at 6:55 pm
Thank you. It would be wonderful to read what you write. Please do post your poems and share them with all of us at P4poetry.
Good poems sometimes go uncommented…but never unread…..wanted to comment on this one the last time i read it….but could not…so here it goes-
I love the poem…..i share similar sentiments…..with this one you truly have struck a chord with almost every p4p reader….and every youngster like me…..or someone whose been through something like this before….great and very relevant theme
Keep writing!
Wah..wah…wah..,etni sunder rachna per kya kaha jay..
Realy seema ji nice one again, and i am ecastasize after read this poem…
Keep smile…
Keep wrinting…
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seema Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 2:25 pm
@Ravi k Rajbhar, Thanks Ravi.. this is more than a poem.. its my life’s story u know…
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Ravi k Rajbhar Reply:
February 20th, 2009 at 2:58 pm
@seema, Ya mam..I feel that this is more..more than a poem because this is your real life’s story i know..
Mai A kah raha tha aap ne yado ko bahut hifazat se rakha hai.aur utane hi sahegta se paper per utar diya hai..
Thans for introduce your real life…..
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