SMS Poetry by Vishvnand »

What Do I Cherish More???

Written by renu rakheja at

February 16, 2009 (6:34 pm)

(3 votes, average: 4.00 out of 5, rated)

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Your kiss, your gaze or your breath
What do I cherish more?
Your breath that I breathed
Suffusing me to the core
Sanctifying me…..
Have kept it inside safely stored
Every breath that I breathe
Intermingles with it and roars
Ecstatic in its union
Electrifying me….
Keeping me alive.

Crowned Poem, English Poetry

13 Comments

Comment by Seema on 16 February, 2009 @ 9:02 pm

Wow! Every breath you take…Nice romantic and simple but soulful..

Also I really like the way you selectively rhyme some of your lines, kind of provides a nice flow…I must try that some time…

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renu rakheja Reply:
February 18th, 2009 at 10:13 am

@Seema, Do try that- it makes the poem more of a poetic dialogue rather than a structured piece

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Comment by Shreyansh on 16 February, 2009 @ 9:08 pm

awesome…length works wonders,the poem is painfully short….and painfully beautiful!

(+)-hmm…everything.right from the flow to the display of ideas and the ending.
(-)-None in particular.

p.s-Carbon dioxide is bad for lungs :p

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renu rakheja Reply:
February 18th, 2009 at 10:14 am

@Shreyansh, lol ! thanks for yr comment

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Comment by Vishvnand on 16 February, 2009 @ 10:41 pm

A very beautiful poem indeed.
Liked it immensely.
The feel & impact on reading the poem was also ecstatic, electrifying & sanctifying too.

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Comment by vartika on 16 February, 2009 @ 10:58 pm

wow! wat a thought!…full of romanticism… mujhe generally bahtu kam logon ki hi romantic poems pasand aati hain… i feel ppl cant handle it well…swayam bhi shayad maine aaj tak ek hi romantic poem likhi hai… par aapki to har romantic poem mujhe bahut appeal karti hai… u are wonderful wen it comes to romancing with words nd thoughts in a romantic poem….