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Dire Consequences of a dream
(15 votes, average: 3.73 out of 5, rated)
Loading ...Dire Consequences of a dream
Sand felt mellow.
Sun felt mild.
Lying hushed on a beach,
With arms stretched wide
Basking in the subtle sounds-
The ballad of the forest orchestra,
The poetry of the comforting breeze…
Allured by me, inched towards me
The shy blue sea.
While I relished every breath,
Gentle fingers ran through my hair…
I saw her face…
As pretty as she was in our school days;
Donned an exotic velvety gown-
Hung off her shoulders by a thread…
She smiled and eased my mind…
God was kind.
“You look so divine, Jade…”
Words came out, involuntarily.
“Jade???”
The words were loud enough;
I shuddered with shock…
To realize
That all those good things
Were not for real…
To realize
That all this time;
I was dreaming on my girlfriend’s lap…
28 Comments
Bravo bro…
I pray that you continue to feel and express the way you do.
This was a gem and I am hoping for more and more to sway our thoughts…keep writing bro…
You need no appreciation for you should know that you are very good…
Dire consequences for telling such a dream, you should get a proper banging from your mom.
Very nice poem though.
Shreyansh…I think this is your best poem so far.It flows beautifully.The words are shining like gently twinkling stars ! Try more of free verse…it sounds more natural and free
what an unexpected ending, really well- written. liked the idea and u must get a slap 4rm ur mom, just kiddin! kudos!!
without doubt yr best ever.. and yu keep getting better everytime.. indeed a kich from your mom should do the trick.. but great composition no doubt
Congratulations brother!!!!
Rightfully adjudged,” Poem of the Day”.
From the very first two lines I knew it was winner…
Well done and keep up the good work…
@ krishna,tarun,neeraj sir,medhini ma’am,vijesh,archisman
thank you for your kind comments.
@preeti i will try that!
@renu maam-yeah I will try do more of free verse…
@vishvnand sir-”naahiiiiin….”
how did i miss rating this, may be I was travelling…..
sorry guruji…..poem is great, all good things happen with girl friends around…….
and one advice, big english words common man ko nahin samaj mein atey………
nothing against you……but it must hv gone unnoticed from my end……u deserve the win…….
wat do u think 4 is enough……….i never give 5 to anybody around, i hvnt seen any 5 star suitable poems as yet….hmmmmm some r near………but my poems r also never near that…….
do reply……………comedy mein uch likhon…..
@ulhas…bro,big english words?please specify some…
I wrote this one with humour…will try to write more.thanks for your comment.
congratulation shreyansh, after all humor is runnerup.meri shubhkaamnayan.
Shreyansh Sen Sharma Reply:
September 16th, 2008 at 5:26 pm
dhanyawaad sir…i wish I could submit this poem for this month’s contest 
Shreyansh, Congrats man…………
Cheers…
When I wrote, the last comment, I meant that the very poem was good, but then you should write a humorous poems also….
Anyways, congrats.
I wish I could have the patience like you,,,
Dying to see your post….been quite sometime,
post something at the earliest…
And congratulations…Keep up the good work,,,
@krishna-There you go bro…”tumne bulaaya aur hum chale aaye…”.Just posted a poem.
Thank you all for your appreciation.
“The shy blue sea.”
i loveee that^
please read mine if you get the chance, i really would like to improve.
it is called “ocean botanical”
Aah.will write something new soon.
haha! Loved the twist in the tale! But the starting few stanzas are so beautiful that you should use them for another poem, perhaps a love poem!! (exclude humour!)
You sure have variety!
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