Drumroll
(6 votes, average: 4.17 out of 5, rated)
Loading ...Drumroll signifies encouragement.Whenever troops used to enter a battlefield,a drum-roll was played to pump them up.VishVnand sir’s comments on Salaam teenagers-”Could someone write a poem which would appropriately encourage them and give solutions towards bettering their lot as also direction towards a right focus in life. It could also then turn out to be a very valuable & a great poem…”.
In a state of peril and pain
Do you give in to fall?
Like a candle in a hurricane
Do you squirm to stand tall?
The mirror of future
Shows a blurred reflection…
The little shrub you nurtured;
Why do you want to scorch it?
You find your opinions hampered
By the untrue words on the streets;
And become one of the many
Who dance to the same beats…
Living someone else’s life
with your name on their door
Learning how to let go,
Which ever way the wind blows
and keeping in dark
what you always pined for.
A star in the city skies..
an eye didn’t even see,
Now flow through the lows and highs…
Reminisce about all you could be.
So take off these jackets;
and fly towards the battleground.
Success will kiss your feet soon,
as the lord plays the drumroll.
8 Comments
The poem flows well.
But if this is an answer or a sequel to Salaam Teenagers which was a great poem …I would suggest that you expand this a bit more.Its basically the last 4 lines where you are offering a solution…If you add the bit about writing your own book of life,listening to your heart,not just flowing with the river etc etc….it would truly become a great sequel
A great poem indeed. Liked it immensely as it is.
You are a gem. Thank you for respecting my request.
You have now a more valuable, advancement advice from Renuji and a no limit capability as we all see.
What more is required….
Here are best wishes to you in plenty
Oh great work dude! You r really really agem, as VishVnand said. And take my advice, write a collection of some of dese poems, and publish it. I assure it’ll be a world hit. U little Frost..
@tarun-chane ke jhaad me mat chadao…
thank you all for your kind comments.
@renu ma’am
I understood what you’r saying…but I never intended to make a sequel…to give the poem individuality.
But now I conclude that your idea is better…Will add another stanza as soon as possible.
Shreyansh,
well done. To me much better than Salaam Teenagers. More mature.
Last line brilliant,
Gion
Aah.will write something new soon.
u know something, u create some great works and this is one of them.
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