When Love was in the Air
(1 votes, average: 3 out of 5)You need to be a registered member to rate this post.
Loading ...When love was in the air
There was someone special to care
Days and Nights looked the same
For 24hrs there was only one name.
When love was in the air
Every small thing seemed to mean
From shoes to my hair,
To know everything, she was keen
But once this air blew away
She looked at me in a strange way
For her, past seemed just an endeavour
But for me, it would last forever ..
“I want to be your Best Friend”
she said it in the end
Everyone around said, “Come onn, move on”
But My Love and Everyone, life cannot be turned Off and On ..
Possibly Related poems:
- Letting Go…
- Is this Love or Passion?
- LOVE IS A MOVEMENT
- Move on!
- The air-less oval shape is ours as well as their……
Comments
That is a very good effort my dear Shreyansh. But once you have written your poem, dont gloat over your work. View it critically, revise it. Give it sheen. Cut down on words not needed. eg. the first verse could have been..
When love was in the air
All things seemed to mean
From shoes to my hair,
To know she was keen…
But anyway, keep it up….I will look forward to your next work.
Thanks, Ravindra for your suggestion of cutting down on words. I will surely revise and try to avoid repetition. But in this case, the purpose of 1st and 2nd para is a bit diff.
Btw, i think, you mistook my thoughts with someone else’s…
great job,close to reality;well written.
[Comment on this comment]